Friday, 18 May 2012

It has got to End


It has got to End

"You wannit?"
"Are you sure?"
"Maybe if you wannit, I can give it to you for half the price"
"Because I like you. And you wannit, innit?"
"You keep sayin' that"
"Keep it"
"Ok. I will take leave"
"Damnit woman! Take it!"
"Fine. Suits you. I am goin'"
"Good bye"
"Good bye, missus"

And now he is gone. And gone are those days when I needed him. When I wanted him to give me what he always carried somewhere hidden in his person. It required an immense amount of fixity to say that one syllable--'No'

What music is to a musician, beats to a dancer, words to a writer, prayer to a dying man, urgency to a doctor, hands to a worker, child to a mother and god to a human; drug is to me.
It makes me high. It makes me want to do things I know I wouldn't if it were not for the ecstatic feeling. The feeling of soaring, the feeling of life, the adamant nature to let go that I annex.

They told me to drop it.
Did i?
They told me it would kill me.
Did it?
They told me they would leave me if I don't leave it.
Did they?
Did I?

So then what made me give it up?
Nothing. Yesterday I needed the euphoria to chase away the insomnia.
Today, I understand that happiness and euphoria are two different words with two different meanings. Oh yes, you will find them to be synonyms of each other in the dictionary. But those people who have penned down these words together in the same line, and have uttered them in the same breath, have not tasted what I have.
I have tasted death. I have tasted death in the form of life, in the form of ebullience.

They say its not healthy.
I say it is, as long as you want to come across your succubus.

DISCLAIMER: The aforementioned dialogue writing is a work of pure fiction.

~~The Girl.


  1. The way you described the feeling and the beginning was particularly powerful.
    Yes there are people whose life totally depends on it and to refuse it is like refusing life for a drug-addict.
    Nice post! I liked the way you weaved the story.

  2. Thank you so much!
    And yes, its true and very sad.


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